Sunday 2 April 2017

LOST

I've recently developed a cycle, almost like the water cycle. I cry (though sometimes not enough) and over time the frustration builds and builds until the floodgates open again. I initially want to say that this is to do with my relationship, but in actual fact that's only one element. I'm not sure when this frustration started but it seems to be the only emotion running through me now. I suppose I could boil it down to 3 categories:

Love.
Work.
Life.

Love: He feels further away than ever.
Work: I've no clue what to do with my degree or my future. I have a few ideas of what I'd like to do but I am constantly changing my mind and can't stick to a career path, even just for the time being.
Life: I'm fed up of living at home, I outgrew my attic bedroom when I left for university and don't share common interests with family so despite being surrounded by people I feel lonely.

Today I've decided to stop caring about everything. It will be easier for me to get through the days without my head feeling like a huge, tight knot. Oh god, am I sliding back?