I'm still alive!

Feeling: Okay

I'm not sure even how long it's been since I last made a post, I am sorry. I'm not sure where to start from, so I'll just dive right in.

You'll know my relationships with immediate family have improved, but they are still strongly opinionated on the medicine front SO.. I ignore what they think of it now! In the last post, I do remember saying how I was feeling much better on the meds and it is still proving to be the best thing for me... when I remember :P

ESA support

So, what's new? The main things are that I'm now on ESA which means I get financial support while I only work a few hours here and there on my embroidery and work on improving my mental state and wellbeing.

Therapy

Also, I have started therapy with an NHS service that specialises for people with depression/anxiety/stress problems for 18's and over around the Dorset/Southampton area. After submitting a self-referral on their website, I made an appointment for my Self-Assessment at the centre, at which they helped to decipher what services they provided that would be suitable for me to reach my goals e.g. 'I want a calmer mind', 'I want to be able to leave my house with little/manageable anxiety'.

CBT once more, but with a difference

So far I have had 3 appointments with my CBT Therapist Frankie - she is really lovely - and have been given homework to do throughout the week (I've completely sloped since my last one, it's Christmas and I want to chiiiiiiiiill). I was rather skeptical as to whether this would work for me, because it's not the first time I've had CBT and I am quite conscientious and self-aware, but I am happy to say that this is new for me in terms of dealing with my Depression and Frankie has taught me things I didn't know about an illness I have.

Distinct Depression characteristics

I know how it feels for me, but everyone's path is different for each individual... and yet the illness has distinct characteristics like stopping the brain from 'firing on all cylinders', as Frankie says, you really focus on negative experience and mood periods - even though you might have some happy times, you won't give them any thought, which is a big learning curve for me.

It's surprising how such a simple fact can completely take you by surprise and shift your view

It is really nice to make another post after what feels like such a long while, I do hope to write more often despite it being the festive season! Things have happened in regards to Threadkin, so I'll come back and give a lowdown on how my first few months trying to start my own business has gone!

Surround yourself with nibbles and get your friends over for a hot chocolate!